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Is Alex Jones Losing His Mind? by Victor Thorn |
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Now it’s bad enough that George Noory is talking about seeing shadow rodents, and Tom Flocco is bamboozling people with his Barbara Olson cock n’ bull story; but Alex Jones now thinks he’s a spider! Maybe his listeners were right: Alex was going off the deep end. I mean, with all these stories floating around about George Bush’s pre-senile dementia and how he rants & raves like a lunatic (i.e. Alex Jones), maybe it’s something in the water down there in Texas. But y’see, it’s even worse than that. For years Alex has been doing a fake Rush Limbaugh impersonation which is, of course, not his real voice. I should know, because I’ve spoken with Jones on the telephone on two different occasions, and he doesn’t do his Limbaugh schtick in real life. So you have to ask yourself: of all the people in the world, why would Jones want to copy or pattern himself after Rush Limbaugh – the biggest phony of all-time? From my perspective, he’s the last person I’d ever want to be like. But for some reason, Alex Jones seems obsessed with wanting to be him. I’m not the only person saying these things. If you watch a clip from Sacred Cow you’ll see a comedian named Joe Rogan giving Jones crap for using his fake Rush Limbaugh voice. He says, “If you could be yourself all the time, wouldn’t that be better than all of a sudden puffing out your chest and becoming Alex Jones.” In essence he’s telling him, “Quit being such a fake. Just talk like yourself.” This scenario reminds me of a story Jim Tucker tells in his recently released Bilderberg Diary where he catches Henry Kissinger off-guard and hears him speaking with a perfect English accent; not his thick, phony German dialect. In other words, Kissinger’s whole delivery is fake – nothing but an affectation. Why would Alex Jones want to act in the exact same fashion as these two New World Order cronies? Regrettably, there’s more. Jones has also been morphing into one of the most effeminate, whiny, childish voices ever known to mankind. And he does it all the time! Why would Alex want to adopt such an effete persona? In between that girlish voice and his rabid, frothing at the mouth out-of-control ranting & raving, it’s no wonder people are starting to question his sanity (ala a hysterical, crazed George W. Bush). Furthermore, as we listened to Alex’s infantile whining, Lisa Guliani commented, “Does he know how obnoxious and embarrassing he sounds?” And it’s true. Is it any wonder that many people in mainstream America don’t take the alternative media seriously? With people like Alex Jones epitomizing the ‘crazed conspiratologist,’ all they do is laugh. Can’t you see? He’s doing us more harm than good by “marginalizing” this movement with the lunatic fringe. Which leads us back to Alex’s recent incarnation as a spider. Now it’d be one thing if he did a fifteen-second impersonation, but Jones actually 'became' a spider for about 15 minutes. He even went from one commercial break to another as a spider, and answered caller’s questions as a spider. As this pathetic display dragged on, Lisa said, “Doesn’t this sound like something that should be on Nickelodeon?” Now ask yourself: do we want our alternative media to become something that resembles Nickelodeon – a children’s show! Plus, I was thinking: what if Alex walked into an Austin bar and started this spider schtick. As we all know, Texas is a bad-ass state, and they don’t take kindly to this type of nonsensical behavior: Alex Jones: (babbling like a lunatic) I’m a little creepy-crawly. I want to eat you up. Texas Redneck: Boy, what the hell are you trying to do? Alex Jones: I’m a hairy little spider dangling from my web. Texas Redneck: A f*#cking what? Alex Jones: I’m a spider. Texas Redneck: Son, we don’t like your kind around these parts. Now straighten-up or I’m gonna whoop your ass. Hell, if Alex pulled his spider act in an Austin bar, they’d probably throw his sorry ass out the door like they did to Pee Wee Herman in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure. What’s Alex going to do next – put on big white shoes, a pink tutu, and dance the Macarena? I mean, I’m from Pennsylvania and I know how to act more like a Texan than Alex Jones does! What’s wrong with this guy? It’s actually pretty mind-boggling to think that in the past month we’ve been putting our asses on the line by taking our 14-foot 9-11 WORLD TRADE CENTER CONTROLLED DEMOLITION banner to Ground Zero and the White House – being in the middle of some very intense scenes – while Alex Jones is playing Romper Room/Sesame Street by pretending to be an itsy-bitsy spider. For pete’s sake, get a grip. Anyway, here’s our WING TV advice to Alex Jones: when you do your radio show from now on, grow up, be a man, and just be yourself. You don’t have to try to be Rush Limbaugh, Pee Wee Herman, or a freaking spider; and for crying out loud, drop the childish effeminate whiner voice. It’s pathetic beyond words. Other than that, Alex, keep scaring people and sucking money out of them – you seem to be real good at doing that. (But y’know what, just between you and me, people are catching on and they’re not falling for your Jim & Tammy Faye Bakker televangelism fundamentalist end-times fear-mongering ruse any more. That one-trick pony has run its last race.) |
On an increasing basis, people have been asking us: What’s wrong with Alex Jones? He seems to be losing his mind. |
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